I have so many words to say. To scream. All directed at one person.
I won't even say most of them.
I have so many words that I want so badly to say. To whisper. To communicate without words. All directed at one person.
I am afraid to say them.
Once upon a time, both of these scenarios were directed at the same individual. Now they are directed at two different ones. One is from the previous situation. One is a new person.
How can I be so conflicted constantly?
One tears my heart to shreds, yet I still love him even though he will never love me. Now I bitch at him and tell him most of what he does wrong. He doesn't seem to like that anymore than he likes my loving him.
One has managed to steal my heart, and yet he doesn't seem to want to be with me on some level. We act as though we are a couple yet we are not (unless I missed that memo).
It is too early to say that I love you, yet it is too late to say that I don't.
Can't I just have it easy for once? Just this once. Just with the one that I am smitten over. Please?
No?...Oh. Okay.
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