Yesterday....
I woke up at 6. Didn't leave until 7:30-ish.
I volunteered to help Jay pack more of his stuff to take it to Cookeville.
He bought me breakfast, but I'm not sure that that makes up for the lack of air conditioning, power, or running water in that house.
I spent nearly all day in Knoxville yesterday.
I was very mad at both Jay and Joel.
I'm not exactly sure what I am right now.
I do know that I cried a lot last night. I feel like crying now. And I just want to go to sleep, but I can't.
I think that I am asking too much of life.
Today is one of those days that I just feel like quitting everything.
Last night...On the way home. I was falling asleep while driving. I was exhausted.
..I wanted a semi-truck to hit me or my car to roll over or just something to happen.
I don't feel very alive right now.
I really wanted to feel a physical pain rather than the mental and emotional pain that I couldn't fight off.
That I can't fight off.
I am slipping, I believe.
Falling backwards.
And none of you know what I mean by those last two lines, I am sure.
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2 comments:
Sending hugs to you and a shoulder to cry on.
I know life can sometimes seem so out of synch and chaotic at times. I know too that darkness can creep in when things seem that way and you just want it all to stop...to end..to go away.
When that happens, remember always you have friends who care about you and that you are special. A wonderful and unique soul who has so much to give.
Many blessings and love to you during this time of stress and always.
Thank you, Krista.
You are a sweet one. You should remember your own words when you too are feeling down.
Remember. People are there for you too. Even if it doesn't seem like it. Seek them out. You never know what may be right before your eyes that you have never noticed before.
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